"Tomato 2" or "How I Learned to Love Tomatoes" is a poem written by Michael Rosen from his book The Hypnotiser.

Unlike Tomato 1, Michael has his heavenly experience of tasting tomatoes. He describes the tomatoes with adjectives contrast to Tomato 1. Apparently, Michael loves the feel of his tongue and lips on the tight skin and he finds biting into the tomato satisfying. A bit of juice lands into his mouth, so he decides to be creative and adds pepper to a tomato, along with a side order of bread. He continues to positively describe the edited tomato.


DISCLAIMER: This is a transcript for the video of Michael performing the poem/book, not a transcript from the actual poem/book itself.

Tomato Two, or how I learned to love tomatoes.

Tomato 2 - Michael Rosen

Tomato 2 - Michael Rosen

When I get in, if there's one thing I love its a fat red tomato. I love the feel of my tongue and lips on the tight skin and make my teeth cut into the flesh, so the juice jumps into my mouth. The coolness, and the wetness. So now I get some pepper and put a few grains on the flesh, so with my next bit of tasty feel starts under my tongue. I get a piece of bread and all the wheat-y meal-y stuff mixes with the juicy tomato stuff, and that's the way it goes down now. Bread and tomato, tomato and bread, and a lovely wet grainy, savoury, flavoury, around the mouth, fruity, bready, mush. Ahhh...

Use in PoopsEdit

  • Because of the frequent use of "fleshy" and "juicy" the poopers have made it used in a sexual context, such as him describing his sexual experience.
  • "Fat" is generally used with The Outing's "big but(t)".
  • "Ahhh..." is usually at the end of Michael in a situation where he relaxes.

Trivia Edit

  • The alternative title for the poem is a reference to the 1964 film Dr. Strangelove: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb.
  • In the original book, Michael adds salt to the tomato instead of pepper.